2015: Out like a tamed lion...

I feel like I should reflect back on another year but don't know where to begin, or if it's even relevant. Does anyone else feel the same? I mean, other than the earth taking another trip around the sun, what's changed? My household has had its share of ups & downs this year but we're probably no different from anyone else. Each person's conditions and lives are unique, true, but happiness and grief go on across the world every moment of every day.

Focusing on the negative comes easy, at least to me. My grandmother died late this fall and that was a huge loss, though not unexpected. She was 90 and in poor health for several years. Even so, she was a beloved woman whose kindness and intelligence positively impacted everyone she knew. Not a lot of us can say that about ourselves or most folks we know.

April suffered a miscarriage on an unplanned but welcome pregnancy. We'd never wanted more kids but when presented with the circumstance, it was filled with joy. The after-effects are still felt.

But through these events we had the love and support of family, friends and acquaintances in ways we hadn't expected. Folks were genuinely supportive and it made the grief and loss a bit more bearable. To quote Ralph Waldo Emerson, "A friend may well be reckoned the masterpiece of nature." Thank you to my friends & family who are there for me.

2015 is also the year we've recommitted ourselves to the Church, to our Catholic faith, which has also been a source of strength during rough times and contributing factor during good times, too. Those who know me in person will tell you I'm not preachy regarding my faith, that I don't find anyone else's particular denomination or faith to be "less than" my own. I converted at age 21 for my sake, no one else's. Both kids are now involved in our parish's youth programs, April teaches Elijah's class, and I'm sponsoring my Dad in RCIA.

The biggest financial news was, of course, purchasing our first home. We'd rented for the the previous four and a half years and while having a landlord to fix little or big things that went wrong was great, owning a home is a privilege I'm extremely grateful for. The house is beautiful and we're looking forward to raising our kids and growing old here.

My kids have both grown so much physically and intellectually, being at or near the top of their respective classes in various subjects. My daughter's musicianship has blossomed and Elijah has turned out to have a passion for mathematics and numbers (something I always struggled with in school). Being their father is an honor.

I rediscovered my love and respect for my wife this year. Now before you read too much in to that, I must clarify that I've always loved and respected her. But as those who've been married or in long term relationships can attest, life can turn into a routine and a loving relationship can, for lack of a better term, coast along. Maybe it's more accurate to say 2015 is the year I've fallen for her all over again and developed a greater appreciation for her beauty, intelligence, love, and all her other qualities.

It's been a banner year for my music collection. I've acquired more than 70 vinyl records, not including the 33 1/3 and 78rpm records my grandparents gave me. Many CDs made their way into my home, too, and I've expanded my musical palette to include artists I previously wouldn't have thought (Wilco and Elvis Costello come to mind). Music has always been my passion to discuss, write about, and spend time with, so I'm incredibly thankful for what I've got.

So there's been much to celebrate this year in my household. I wish the best for you all as one year closes and another opens, full of possibility and promise. Happy New Year to us all.  

Help Must Be Offered... but at what price?

I don't know how to feel about the Syrian Refugee Crisis, how to deal with it and comprehend it, and I bet I'm not alone.

Many liberals are saying to allow any and all of the refugees in to the West, not just the USA; Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau (son of Pierre, the PM of Canada who did more damage to the country's economy and reputation than any before him, and Margaret, his much younger wife who liked to party with The Rolling Stones) wants to bring 25,000 refugees to Canada by the end of 2015. Chief Empty Suit President Obama has made similar, though less demanding, claims of allowing mass numbers of Syrians across our borders. 

Some conservatives, such as Donald Trump, want to turn them all away and let the sharks feed on them. Others say they feel bad but send them elsewhere or keep them in refugee camps, they're someone else's problem. Several governors have denied them access to even entering their state. 

The current political disputes over what to do with refugees overshadow the history of why they're fleeing to begin with. The (extremely) short version is when Syrian civilians began a peaceful protest in the Spring of 2011, the situation spiraled out of control quickly when the government responded with torture and murder. Syrian President Bashar al-Assad was once seen as someone who might bring positive reform for free speech and human rights but is the one who ordered the crackdowns and shows no sign of advancing anyone's rights but his own.

Four and a half years later, the country remains engulfed in a Civil War and is divided into territories controlled by Assad, rebel fighters, and terrorists. Because our Civil War happened in the century before last, we as Americans cannot empathize with the plight of these refugees. For as much as we disagree with many of our politicians, we don't feel the need to risk life and limb on the ocean to escape.

Like so many around the world, my heart ached when I read the story of Abdullah Kurdi, whose wife and two young boys (aged three and five) drowned off the coast of Turkey. Images of families fleeing their war-torn homeland dominated this past Autumn's news. Living in an average small American town with a minimal crime rate and where my biggest complaints about the local government are raising taxes and not plowing my road well enough in the winter, I cannot fathom what these people are going through. Hell on Earth for most of them, I imagine. 

But then there's ISIS. The Jihadi Johns of the world (well, not him anymore), cut from the same ilk who flew into the World Trade Center, who arrive in public squares in their own towns to blow up innocent children, and who most recently staged a multi-faceted attack across Paris. These monsters will use any extreme methods of brutality to wreak havoc on the free and civilized world. We have good reason to believe they might have, or soon will, enter America.

How does that affect how we should react to refugees who want to enter our border? When they originally began their flight to Turkey (by the hundreds, not hundred-thousands), they were made to register themselves. I don't know by what means - physical ID, government papers, etc., or simply a declaration of name and origin. I don't think it's unreasonable to ask for the same when entering America: proof of one's identity and background checks to help ensure you are who you say you are. But we can't even properly document illegal aliens from other countries, let alone political refugees from Eurasia.  

I'll end this article the same way it began: I don't know how to feel. A balance must be reached between an open-door policy and protecting our citizens. These people, innocents driven from their homes and suffering unbearable hardships, need help...it just cannot be at the cost of American lives.